Saturday, May 3, 2014

Who knows

Who knows where the path leads
Who knows where we travel in our dreams
The nightmares so surreal
Who is to say what is truly real
So many thoughts bombard
So many pictures of what is serene
What is to say what is reality


There are words swimming in my brain
There are pictures flooding my space
There are feelings revolting in place
Who are these people running this race?

So easy to point the blame
Not so easy to brush the shame
Memories in pieces show some face
And so quickly monsters take their place

So hopeless helpless hitherto I bring it to you
So fearless you seem
So heartless in me
So practical for him
Secrets are well hidden within

Many are dreamers the endless spectrum of fears

Forgive me

It was 3 o'clock in the morning
You had no stop light warning
Of the demons that would choke when you called.
The words yelled out belittling
And I stood by and watched
My own fear had me frozen
And nothing I had done.
Do you forgive me
For allowing the beating
Like spear flames the pain flew
And i stood on and watched.
It destroyed what little we had built
And it's obviously my fault
Your forgiveness I seek
To go back to what once was...

Sunday, April 20, 2014

For you

With every pill I swallow, a part of me is suppressed
What is the sacrifice being made for superficial success
To be considered functional in this society, who is there to impress
With every pill I swallow, my soul lives more depressed

And every dream I have, leaves me uneasy with a fear
For I call my nightmares dreams because it's all I hold dear
My subconscious mind emerges though horrors I will see
At least it's some sort of truth of what still lies in me

Who am I today, who am I tomorrow
Smiling through a million tears, pained with such sorrow
For everyone's sake, I keep my mask well fit
To let them see what's forsaken me? It's selfishness.

Saturday, March 8, 2014

You Know My Name

You don't know me, but you know my name
When did this happen, this fall from grace
You see my eyes, my soul disappears
In my disguise I hide years of fears
You can't see me- for who I really am
Your eyes deceive you and you mind condemns
If you don't understand it
How can you love it
If you can't embrace it
How can you appreciate
Time comes slowly
Time comes so slowly
When will I be able to speak again
When will I be able to see me
I can't fathom this disgust I'm in
So how can I blame you to not trust in me
I'm standing in the pouring rain
I'm standing still so no one sees my pain
Smiles and laughter the cowards way out
I smile and I laugh because I'm dying
Slowly, hearing the bell tower toll
Seething in the blistering cold
You don't know me, but you know my name
When did this happen, this fall from grace 

Strangers Now

Past lives seem to haunt me
Making my dreams feel I'm crazy
So many strangers now they've become

What happened to friendships forever
Or was that promise really just shallow
Too many times I've closed my eyes
To ignore the things I've left behind

I'm sorry so please forgive me
I know it's my fault
I know it's all my fault
I'm sorry so please forgive me
I brought this on myself
It was selfish, oh so selfish

I try to place the blame on you
I try to point the finger but it's a mirror I see
So many times my mind explores
What could have been
What should have been
But that's what my nightmares are made of

I'm sorry, so please forgive me
I know it's all my fault
That we're strangers now

Sunday, February 23, 2014

Withered Weather

Swaying in dance the clouds never seem to clear over the times that we move
Clearly the sun has hidden it's face today for no reason that we can say
Sometimes we dance in the rain between raindrops we crave
The enjoyment of what the sky presents for tomorrow doesn't always allow
A new ecstasy that we can breathe in for the day's long and short
For the days, for the days are long and short
And the moon's coward grace – humbled during the day's grandiose existence
Finds it's way to lighten the darkest skies

Back at it

Monday, January 6, 2014


there's a beauty in my morbid coping ways
you see damaged flesh while i see pain dissipate
for the numbness gets released with each cut
the pain is then lost and I become distraught

for nothing compares to the relief this brings
no music no song no friendly givings
the wounds will heal the scars will stay
for a short while then they they'll fade

and back to the we go through the cycle it seems
of passionate to's and fro's in such extremes