Walking cautiously balancing it all
Fearing the failure fearing a fall
Building up pressure earthquakes ahead
Counting the hours growing in dread
Tension increases chest so tight
Crying impatience through most nights
Faces in memories fiending the past
Breath sacrificed how much more can it last
Painted smiles dancing glass figurines
Trust defiled nothing’s what it seems
Forced to go stepwise wanting to fly
No more filters to decipher the lies
Enslaved in the present no path to move on
And finally allowing tears to crash down
Impulsively throwing flinging out everything
Tell you my thoughts dire need of healing
A waterfall of beauty, words poured in my heart
Days went on heavenly even when apart
Bedtime was treasured your breath felt inside
Tortures of the world were another's demise
Painstakingly observed actions you took
Foolishly pretended I could not read your book
Instincts ignored how could this be fraud
Until awakened for your presence was gone
List after list, scribbling false hates
Deeply knowing emotions cannot be faked
So with this letter perhaps a song
These were the consequences to your wants
Missed you then, today, possibly tomorrow
But one day soon your name will not be my sorrow
Admitting to myself admitting to you
Yes I still care though our lives are through
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